Busting Through Self Limiting Beliefs
Today I want to talk to you briefly about the subject of self-limiting beliefs and how we can work through these to change our behaviours for the good of our life and more positive career outcomes... sound good?
Let's jump in! A new financial year can be an exciting time for many. Yet also trigger thoughts and feeling of self-worth in relation to finances as we are clearly able to reflect on the past 12 months in our business financially. I know for me this year that brought up some thoughts about lack, wanting more and how my business has changed since I began my life coaching journey 2 years ago. But having that clear picture is an ideal time to play big and plan exciting new projects without boundaries!
This might not feel comfortable to start if you have some less than positive thought patterns surrounding your work and life holding you back. And put simply that's what self-limiting beliefs are... beliefs that hold us back from living the life we want and achieving our unique potential. And just by believing them we do not think, do or say the things that they inhibit! In the words of Tara mohr the keep us 'playing small'.
Self-limiting beliefs show up in different ways. They are thoughts and beliefs predominantly about ourselves and self-identity that hold us back that much we know. But the tricky thing here is that these unhelpful thoughts have been cemented into our beliefs system. which is why we often don't question them.
These beliefs are reinforced by
The 'critical' things we say to ourselves
The images we have created of ourselves doing things badly instead of doing things well
Comparison to others doing the things we dream of and making a judgement
The negative feelings we have
Education - messages taught to us from a young age from teachers, peers and parents
The things we think we should be doing
Faulty logic based on subconscious thoughts and fears instead of reality
Fear - and by this I mean a fear of failing and criticism which is a social fear, but also a subconscious fear that our deeply rooted needs will be harmed
When you look at that list it's no wonder we are limiting our potential! However, there are some simple and effective things we can do to work through these self-limiting beliefs to work towards playing bigger in life and career. As you might imagine self-work is at the core.
The first step is to recognise the self-limiting belief and call it out!
After that, you can begin the rewarding work of busting those badly formed limitations! Think about a time when you have done something (or not done something) that seemed to limit you in some way. For example, didn't pitch a project because you told yourself you are not ready/researched enough yet. What steps lead to that decision? Can you pinpoint any thought patterns here? What beliefs lead you to this belief?
Dig a little deeper...Can you recall the first time you thought in this way? What made you believe this? With hindsight can you begin to unpick it? You might start to recognise patterns!
Next, recognise its falsehood and try and work on gaining some perspective around the situation. Beliefs can be both limited and limiting. What do your peers think? Often I find this a good way to gain perspective. I am not suggesting you take on someone else's belief system here! But getting feedback might allow you to position your thought process differently and look at the limiting belief from a different angle!
Now you can explore the reality of the goal you want to achieve knowing that a limiting belief is just that... limiting you to a very narrow window of opportunity! Ask yourself what do I know to be true and factual about this thing?
After this, the work on mindset, on building new belief that you can achieve the thing/s you want to! You can begin simply by focussing on what you DO want to happen and not on old patterns of your previous belief systems. This can take time and may need more specialist support from your coach. But it all starts with you.
Try reinforcing your new beliefs with actions that support it gently but purposefully! What might they be? How are they different from how you would have previously thought and acted before you had uncovered your limiting belief?
I'd love to hear your experiences around this subject. Any tactics you have used that have improved your life and allowed you to work towards your full potential! Or how I can help you get a step closer to find new clarity. Comment blow or email me